Beauty From Ashes

A decade ago, my husband and I were still newlyweds, empty nesters, and both working full-time. We anticipated no changes in this (well, except that we wouldn't always be newlyweds) as time went on. Brad was in seminary, but we figured that wherever he got a church call, I would be teaching.

A decade ago, in another state, our granddaughter was in the care of her mother, her grandparents, and a child welfare worker. Her mom was very young, and my son wasn't helping parent the baby. We didn't know that the state had gotten involved and taken custody of our 1 year old granddaughter. It was a difficult time for her immediate family, and especially for her mom, who loved her daughter very much, but was struggling to provide everything a toddler requires.

Our granddaughter's need for stability became God's call on our lives. We gave up our empty nest and dual-income lifestyle and began parenting a 27-month-old girl. We eventually adopted her, as the court removed parental rights from our son, and her mom chose to voluntarily relinquished her rights in order for us to adopt. We agreed that our daughter would stay in contact with her original family as much as possible. This is akin to inheriting your spouse's family as your own. They aren't always people that would naturally become your buddies, but you spend time with them anyway. It wasn't always easy, but it was always good, especially for our daughter. We have seen her birth family at least twice a year (and often more frequently) for the past 10 years.

Fast-forward to last week. Our daughter is now 11, and she wanted her mom to come to see us. We, her mom, and her mom's parents all worked to get transportation arranged for our daughter's mom. She brought her one-year-old daughter with her.

And we were so blessed.

There are no words to express the joy of watching my daughter and her mom together. The joy of big sister and little sister getting to really know each other. We shared all of our normal everyday activities with them. Our daughter's mom got to sit in on a choir practice, piano lesson, and home school lessons. She got to meet her daughter's good friends, go to breakfast at a family friend's house, and play in our favorite "hot pot" river holes.

Sometimes, adopted children (or those around them) talk about their "real" parents. Our lucky girl has two REAL moms and two REAL dads. And she knows them all. She loves them all. They all love her. THIS is open adoption at its best.

In calling us to parent this sweet girl, God opened our hearts to her entire family. It hasn't always been easy for any of us, but it has been good for all of us. And this daughter of ours is worth it...to ALL of us.