A. Year.

A year. A year of quarantine. A year of pandemic. A year of staying home. A year of family, but not extended family. A year of online school for our teen. A year of homeschool for me and the little guys. (Well, that wasn't different! Homeschooling has been happening in our home for years.)

This was. A. Year. Strangest I've ever had, for sure! The past 12 months have been different in many ways. We could all list many things we've disliked: masks, chapped hands, social distancing...

But this was also a GOOD year. Yes, I'm serious. 

Each of us has had one COVID-birthday. Our middle dude is on the verge of a second one, but we're hoping that the tribe lifts some restrictions so we can invite people for an outside party. And this year we started some new birthday traditions: The birthday person gets a personal cake in addition to a family cake; and I've learned how to make an ice cream cake. 

We worshipped at home. The five of us and all three of our cats. We huddled together around my computer, sang worship and praise, and listened to the weekly sermon my husband posted on YouTube. We were able to pause and answer questions, which grew our faith.

We got outside. Not as much as we usually do, but we got out to hike and kayak several times. We wore masks when we were near people, but mostly were able to go maskless because we were isolated from others. It was a joy~reminded me of why outdoor activities are so welcome in my life.

We made a million memories! When the fireworks were cancelled, we made our own with eggshells filled with paint. If you throw them at things (boxes! We threw them at boxes!), the splatter looks like fireworks. When Little Beaver Celebration was cancelled, we made our own carnival, rides and all! Our teenager planned monthly "sleepovers" with the boys in the living room. She planned the treats, the movies, the decorations...all on a theme each time! We even made a haunted house for Halloween! And the kids made pinata pumpkins which we filled with candy and broke on Halloween.

We had a New Year's Eve party, complete with a photo booth. We, like everyone, hoped that 2021 would be a year of joy. January brought political unrest nationwide, but peace and hope here at home. February brought vaccines to our community, our state, and our arms! 

Almost exactly a year after we began to social distance, we are fully vaccinated. We are grateful for the possibilities that brings. And we're also grateful for the home-centered-year that we've had. Re-entering the "rat race" will bring different joys, but we'll always have the memories of that year. Because it's been A. Year.

God Glue

 

A dear Christian friend told me recently that I was living in fear because I was practicing social distancing and wearing a mask. I responded that I'm not afraid, instead I have compassion on the medical systems and their employees. I want to be sure not to add to the burden they are carrying through this pandemic. I also remain careful because we live among the Jicarilla Apache people, and the Indigenous people of our continent have suffered immense losses due to diseases in the past and present. I will not be responsible for the spread of this disease here on the reservation!

After our conversation, I was musing about how I felt about catching the coronavirus... and about dying. I realized I have very little fear of dying, but I do have concerns about my family. My exact thought was, "I'm the glue that holds this family together." As soon as that thought crossed my mind, I corrected myself. I should not be the glue that holds this family together. God should be.

I'm important in our family, for sure. I'm the one teaching the kids. I'm the one that cooks and cleans (by choice, not by default or pressure!). Brad is important in our family, too. He's the one that makes actual money. He's the one that leads our worship and devotions. But neither of us are what holds our family together.

God holds our family. He holds our family together. He leads us in every part of our lives. God Glue is the important factor. 

And I started thinking of ways that we live out what I believe: God's got this. HE is in charge and HE has a wonderful plan for all of our lives. No matter what happens, God will be with each one of us. We are never alone. Never without resources. Never without hope. 

So what do I do with this important fact that I want my children to live by?

1) Tell them! Our kids sometimes ask us what would happen to them if we both died. We always tell them that God has a plan for them. We say that we don't know what the plan is, but God does! He will provide for them in every circumstance. Eternally! (We also have some concrete things in place that the kids know about.)

2) Live this knowledge! We live like God has a plan for us! People ask when we're going to retire, and we say, "God is in charge. When He gives us the signal that we should retire, we will. When the kids ask where we're going to live after Papa retires, we say, "The blue house in Pagosa (which we own at this point), if that's what God wants." We adults have to show our own trust in God's plans so our children see our faith.

3) Talk about God's part in your family. When someone is mean, we ask if that is how God wants us to behave. When someone destroys somebody's something, we talk about how God wants us to treat each other. When we watch a movie, we talk about how the characters are/aren't listening for God's Will. In our read-aloud books, we discuss how the characters are walking in God's way (or are not). 

So I repeat: I am not living in fear. And I am not the glue of our family. Our family would go on fine without me... because God is our glue. And that never ends. Never dies. Never fades away. 

Amen.

A To-Be List for 2021

 I can't imagine anyone saying that 2020 was their best year yet. It has been a year of challenge for the entire world. I'm looking forward to 2021, and I have been thinking about all the things I want to do: visit my parents and grandchildren, meet up with friends, get the vaccine, use those airplane tickets that are on hold...I've got a long list.

This week, though, in several places and manners, I have read about and thought about something different. The question shouldn't really be "What am I going to do in 2021?" but rather, "Who am I going to be in 2021?" 

Profoundly different. Vastly more important. And worth asking.

Who do I want to be? 

I want to be God's woman, first and foremost. I want to live my life as belonging to God. This fact anchors the rest of who I want to be.

I want to be a godly wife. I want to love my husband in ways that please God. This does not mean that I am subservient or somehow a second-rate citizen. I am so loved by God that I am inspired and enabled to love my husband with similar commitment as God's love for me. 

I want to be a godly mother and teacher. I want to love my children with grace. I want to hold them accountable and still teach them God's grace. I want to guide them with love, and I want to show them God's glory. 

I want to be a loving friend and daughter. Relationships are precious. I want to be the kind of daughter and friend who is there when times are tough, and is there to celebrate joyous occasions. 

I want to be a contributing citizen of the community. I want to be an asset, not a deficit. I want to contribute positively in my home, neighborhood, town, state, country, and world. I want to make this a better place for all of us.

I want to be me. God created me to be me, not a copy of someone else. I have no aspirations to be someone else, just a better me. 

Who do you want to be in 2021?

It's worth thinking and praying about.

We Do Not Lose Heart

 2020 has been a year of losses. In Dulce today, we are feeling this sharply and acutely. Those losses are real, painful, and bring much sorrow. Across the world, people are mourning the loss of loved ones. Even people who have not lost someone in their inner circle are feeling the communal loss of over 1.5 million souls. 

In addition to the loss of life, we are all feeling the loss of our loved ones' presence. It's hard to go so long without hugging our grown children, our parents, our siblings. It's difficult to accept a lonely Thanksgiving and Christmas. It's sad to chat with friends from six feet away, with masks, when we long to hug and be hugged.

The deprivation of our routine and pleasurable experiences (visiting, shopping, eating out, etc) is another grief. Many of us have not eaten in a restaurant for almost a year. We have not set foot in a retail space (other than groceries) since March. Maybe not as intense as the loss of relationship, this definitely does cause heartache.

Our family has not had deep financial hardship, but some families have. Losing a job can cause despair. Losing a business is calamitous. There are so many victims of this pandemic, we cannot count them all. And they hurt. These losses ache in our souls.

In a world and a heart filled with grief, this morning I read 2 Corinthians 4. Verse 8 resounded in my weary heart: "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." In verse 16, it says, "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."

We do not lose heart grabbed my attention. It's not a command; it is a statement of fact. We do not lose heart. Christians, we grieve. We feel the losses of the pandemic and other calamities. It all hurts! But we do not lose heart. We cling to the truths of Jesus: We are loved. We are forgiven. We are held. This world is not our home. All sadness and hurt will end. Jesus will wipe away every tear that we hold. Every sorrow will be gone.

For all those grieving today. Turn toward Him. Grab the promises. Remember that you are not alone. Fix your eyes on Jesus. 

Amen and amen.

Galatians 1:24

 My husband is preaching through Galatians right now. In preparation for a recent sermon, I read the section of Scripture he was going to address (Galatians 11-24). It is basically Paul giving his credentials as an apostle, assuring the church in Galatia that the gospel Paul preached to them was the one directly from Jesus Christ. The final verse, though, grabbed my eye: "And they praised God because of me." 

Paul's life has certainly led to many people to praise God. Paul's testimony is bold and clear throughout
the New Testament. His words cause me to pause and ponder often. I think his statement is not boasting, but rather, the truth. 

Wouldn't that be a nice legacy? They praised God because of me. Not because I'm so important, but because God's work is so important. I would like to be the kind of Christian that causes people to praise God. But a few verses (Galatians 1:10b) before this one, Paul also says, "If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." So we can't plan our Christian service around making people praise God because of us. 

We can't plan our Christian service around anything because of us. This is God's work. We are only a small piece of God's plan, and we are to follow Christ, not lead. So we do the mundane tasks God has put before us, praising God as we go. 

For me, this is laundry and cooking and teaching young minds. It's keeping in touch with people. It's sharing food with neighbors and strangers. It's praying for my children, grandchildren, parents, other people's children, and more. 

Sometimes, it doesn't feel like much. It's certainly not going to inspire many to praise God because of me. BUT (and it's a big "but") this is what God has called me to. It is my calling. My job. Whether any human appreciates it or not. 

And, as Jesus says in Matthew 11:30, the burden is light. I love it! Sure, there are moments when I wish the laundry would end or that nobody needed me right then, but God has prepared me well for the task of raising and teaching children. He has moved in my life in ways that have built my skills for this. 

Who am I to say that the work to which God has called me is unimportant? It is vital , or He would not have called me to it. It is my work, for Him. I pray that I can do it well so that someday I will hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

Do not doubt that your call from God is worthy. No matter what He has called you to, it is your work for Him. Treasure the opportunity to serve Him! Do your very best, and when you can't do your best, ask God to strengthen you; He will. Keep at it, and when you don't have the energy to do that, ask God to renew your strength. Isaiah 40:31 says He will. You can trust that!

Amen and amen.

Deleting Candy Crush

 I'm sure you've heard of Candy Crush. I had, but had never played it. In an idle moment a couple of weeks ago, I downloaded it. There's been plenty of time for distractions during this pandemic, that's for sure! Especially, the past couple of weeks, since I am nursing a stress fracture in my foot. (I tried ignoring it, but that didn't work so well. It had gotten worse until I truly began to rest it a few days ago.)

Candy Crush is fun! It is inherently rewarding, and exciting, and it gives the illusion of accomplishment. I found myself focusing intently on passing level after level. I even broke my own "rule" and spent money to buy the power-ups occasionally! 

Spending money wasn't the problem, though, in the end. I can certainly see that being a problem for people, but my problem was the focus. Sometime yesterday morning, I read Philippians 4:8: "Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things."

I had already been aware that I was spending an awful lot of time and energy on Candy Crush, but this verse pulled me back into a Biblical focus with a bang! Now, there's nothing wrong with Candy Crush, just like there's nothing wrong with technology. But we only have so many minutes in a day, and we only have so much focus and energy to spend...

I was spending so much time, focus, and energy on Candy Crush that I wasn't interacting with my family as I'd prefer. I wasn't reading my Bible as much as I usually did. The house wasn't as clean as usual (but I can't blame Candy Crush for that, that's because of my foot pain--lol). You get the idea. 

I want to be clear: It's not Candy Crush that was the problem! I could've been (and have been in the past) distracted from focusing on God by so many things. The only way to assess this is to think about what we've been focusing on instead of God and His goodness. 

So, take a moment today. Assess what you're focus is on in this pandemic. Are you obsessively watching the news? Texting with a friend? Worrying? Playing a game? Even inherently "good" activities like reading books, exercising, or cleaning can be a wrong-focus if it's replacing your God-focused activities and thinking. And God-focused activities and thinking don't have to be individual activities like reading the Bible or memorizing Scripture! Interacting with your family members can be a way of serving God, especially if you intentionally display God-honoring characteristics during the interactions. 

So I deleted Candy Crush. And intentionally started a puzzle (which by the end of the day, had drawn in several family members for a bit of time). And downloaded a new Scripture memorization app. And played a game with my kids. 

May God continue to lead me in His direction, all the days of my life.

God's Got This

 

The election is coming up. There is a lot of consternation about mail-in voting, in-person voting in a pandemic, the outcome of the election, and more. About half of the citizens are convinced that absolute anarchy will rule if the Democratic candidates are voted in as president and vice-president, and about half the citizens are convinced that absolute anarchy will rule if the Republican candidates are voted in. There is a lot of hate, anxiety, and accusation being thrown around on social media and in person.

Christian, let me remind you: God's Got This! Yes, even THIS. He is sovereign, and however our political future is shaped, He is in charge. Remember that He allowed the Babylonians to destroy Jerusalem and carry away His people! And then He redeemed them. He knows the outcome of every single thing we worry about. 

I'm not saying that we shouldn't care about what's happening in our country. The Bible tells us to be involved in the world (but not of the world). We should care and work for our beliefs and values. But we shouldn't fear what is to come! 

We can rest assured that God in in control and the outcome will be His. No matter how things turn out on Election Day. As a recent meme stated, "Don't let the elephants and the donkeys make you forget that you're a child of the lamb!" 

Knowing that God is sovereign and that whatever the outcome of the election, His will is done makes it possible for us to respond with love and concern to those whose ideas differ from ours. I know there are some citizens out there who choose not to engage with people with specific beliefs; I respect that, but it doesn't mean that we can't have basic human decency toward those people. Calling others hateful names, damaging their property or bodies, these are things that are against what the Bible expresses. We can disengage with others without being hateful. 

God's Got This. However the election turns out, God is in control and we can trust Him to take the outcome and somehow make it His.